Arnold J. Rimmer

-There now follows a communique from Dave Lister, Rimmer`s agent and liason with Manager Mac Loaf :

So, you want to know about Rimmer? Well, Arnold J. Rimmer is a complete coward. He will run away from anyone and anything. The man is a maggot, a complete weasel, but a weasel with a survival streak as wide as the rings around Saturn. The Rimmer that went to TBG is the hologram one (i.e. he`s dead and really just a computer simulation of his former self - he`s just a tad sensitive about it), and so you might wonder how you could hit him, and how he could hit you.
Well, I`ve tampered with his light-bee so that I can force him into Hard-Light mode from remote control. Now that should prove interesting.
Rimmer dreams of becoming an officer. He has his own salutes, hangs his underpants on hangers, quotes Space Corps Directives (usually wrongly) and failed his AstroNavigation Exam by writing `I am a fish` many times and then fainting.
Oh yes, one other thing I forgot to mention. Rimmer is a complete and utter Smeghead!

Assorted Quotes:
  • "Well, I just have one thing to say to you!... We surrender, completely and totally. Sorry."
  • "Okay then - transmit our surrender in all known languages... including Welsh."
  • "Ah... Yes... but you're forgetting Rimmer Directive 124 which says 'No way you smug *******s!'"
  • "Only the good die young!"


    Summary:

    Arnold J. Rimmer - *sigh*
    Despite Mac Loaf's patient management, Rimmer always managed to make himself the 'nearly' man. Despite his long spell in TBG, ranging from Middleweight to Flyweight, he never quite got the title shot he (well, ok - not him, but his Manager) deserved. His highest ranking was listed one week in 2000 as the #3 Flyweight in the World.

    Rimmer has seen it all during his time at TBG, with his debut coming against the great Konstantin Tszyu in a Welterweight bout on February 22, 1997 - Tsyzu by the way went on to win the World Middleweight Championship vs. Nazgul Lord on November 4, 1997, and the World Welterweight Championship vs. Wayne "Puckman" Gretzky on March 30, 1998 amongst a glittering career. Sadly the fates were not so kind to Rimmer.

    During his time, Rimmer has fought 8 Former World Champs, 4 World Challengers, 15 Former Regional Champs and 5 Regional Challengers. He has also overturned a World Champion, beating future Flyweight Champ Freddy in a Bantamweight bout on April 11, 2000. Freddy went on to win the World Flyweight Championship vs. Kiki Rojas on December 11, 2000.

    Arnold J. Rimmer. The most experienced, joint most successful and one of the oldest fighters in Mac Loaf's gym. Imagine what might have been achieved had Rimmer not been a complete and utter Smeghead!


    You can create a scouting report on this fighter if you want.

    Arnold J. Rimmer stands 5 feet 8 inches tall. He has a wimpy build and refuses to report his weight. He is currently registered in the Jupiter Mining Corporation division. He runs away for United Kingdom and is tolerated by Mac Loaf.

    He refuses to fight, prefering to run away.